Medical Torture 2.0

Those of you who follow me on facebook and twitter will know that I have severe spinal damage and chronic pain. You will also know that I, like many chronic pain sufferers, am adamantly against the ill-thought-out CDC guidelines that condemn doctors for prescribing opioids and make it that much more difficult for patients in pain to receive adequate care. My favorite – and yes, I’m being sarcastic – is cases of patients post-surgery being denied pain care. While the CDC says it has only issued “guidelines,” doctors are at the same time being penalized for providing appropriate care, and in the meantime, patients in pain continue to suffer.

Supposedly, this is all to stop drug addicts from overdosing. Well, why should legitimate pain patients, taking their medication in compliance with their doctors’ orders, have to suffer because some people choose to abuse opioids? It’s bullshit and what it amounts to is medical torture. It also leads people to acts of desperation.

My husband has a broken back. That’s not the actual diagnosis, but what it amounts to is a severe spinal fracture and a vertebra out of alignment pressing on nerves. He needs surgery but we’re jumping through all the hoops right now preparatory to that. It also means he’s in excruciating pain. My pain levels, on a scale of 1-10 hover around a six on an average day. I’m used to working with pain, I was a ballet dancer after all, but his are through the roof. His doctor wisely prescribed Vicodin (and I cannot tell you how his pain doctor bitched and whined about that when we booked the appointment. I flat out told the fool that if he refused to prescribe, we’d have our primary care physician do it because obviously we took the fucking Hippocratic oath more seriously than he did). It barely touches my husband’s pain, but it does allow him some quality of life and to do physical therapy (aqua therapy, since that is all his injury will allow). Once he has his surgery, he will taper off the pain medication and all will be well. This is our plan (though we dropped one surgeon because he hinted that he would not prescribe anything for the pain post a surgery for SPINAL FUSION. Wtf is wrong with these people?).

Ok. So, I take medication, Sannion takes medication. We keep them carefully lined up on a table in the living room between where we each sit. It works for us and we know where they are, and are able to take them right before bed, no problem. We rarely have anyone in the house and our housemate is utterly trustworthy. Today, while Sannion and I were at physical therapy, our housemate let a repairman in to fix some stuff. I ran into him while I was heading to the car and he apologized for not coming over yesterday as planned. He’d hurt his back badly. I told him if he needed to, our job could wait, and he should go rest, but he has two kids to feed and resting isn’t on the agenda. We thought no more about it. When we came back, we couldn’t find Sannion’s Vicodin bottle. (Mind you, we don’t move them. We have a standard place for them so WE won’t lose them!). We are 99% sure that our repair man pocketed the bottle in the five minutes that he was left alone in the living room.

I don’t blame him one bit, though we’re not in a good place now. We don’t dare ask our doctor for more, not until the 15th, when Sannion would normally see her. “Someone stole my opioid” is one of the textbook things people say when they’re drug seeking. The problem is, someone did steal them! So, now, my husband is going to be in terrible pain for a week. Thing is, we don’t blame the workman. Pain does this to people. It makes one desperate. It makes every minute seem like an hour of unrelenting agony. It makes every moment something that you will do anything to stop. This is a good man, this workman. I guarantee you his ethics are impeccable 99% of the time. This is not something he would ever have contemplated under normal circumstances. I also guarantee that he went to the doctor when he injured himself two days ago and was denied pain medication. He was desperate. This is the result of the opioid hysteria promulgated by our government for no God damned reason other than torturing people in pain. When you cut people off from medication they need you force them to do terrible things, to become drug seekers, to go out and possibly get illegal drugs, and any number of other dangerous and debilitating things. The suicide rate amongst chronic pain patients has, I read a couple of months ago, has risen by over 35% since these “guidelines” went into effect.

Doctors are torturing patients. They themselves are being ridden by a government that simply doesn’t give a shit about anyone. The people suffering are some of the most vulnerable. So remember this at the ballot box. People in pain – and sooner or later, age catches up to you all – are at the mercy of politicians without any.


EDIT: we now have a lock box for all our meds. *sigh*

About ganglerisgrove

Galina Krasskova has been a Heathen priest since 1995. She holds a Masters in Religious Studies (2009), a Masters in Medieval Studies (2019), has done extensive graduate work in Classics including teaching Latin, Roman History, and Greek and Roman Literature for the better part of a decade, and is currently pursuing a PhD in Theology. She is the managing editor of Walking the Worlds journal and has written over thirty books on Heathenry and Polytheism including "A Modern Guide to Heathenry" and "He is Frenzy: Collected Writings about Odin." In addition to her religious work, she is an accomplished artist who has shown all over the world and she currently runs a prayer card project available at

Posted on June 6, 2020, in Uncategorized and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.

  1. I would also add prescription insomnia medications to this list as well. I’ve been denied those repeatedly, and had to even take a drug test once to get lunesta. She said they needed to know if I was a marijuana user or some such nonsense. None of their damn business, I say!


    • ganglerisgrove

      I believe ALL drugs should be over the counter. the only law should be to accurately list ingredients and possible side effects. but i’m a fucking adult. I don’t need the government up in my shit.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I can’t agree with you more. Due to military service, my husband has suffered severely with pain & been through surgeries. I suffered injuries due to decades of nursing as a vocation & caring for my spouse since the 1970’s.
    Sadly those who have abused pain pills/opioids have made it almost impossible to find a doctor that will prescribe medication that can relieve the torture pain inflicts without mercy.
    After being treated myself at the Veterans hospital for decades, going outside for care is even worse. How can Doctor’s be so heartless! And how do they sleep at night?
    Lighting a candle before my healing altar for you & your husband. May the Divine Physician Apollo, his son Asclepius & his daughter Hygiea.send you & your beloved relief & compassionate medical help.

    Liked by 1 person

    • ganglerisgrove

      here’s the thing: if someone wants to do drugs/abuse drugs; go for it. (with the caveat that if you harm someone else while doing so, you should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law but otherwise, enjoy yourself). I think the problem is America’s very puritanical obsession that somewhere, someone is having a break from reality for a moment. It’s government overreach, just like prohibition was, not a result of anyone abusing drugs. I don’t think the government has a right to dictate whether or not we can use drugs. I never felt strongly about it before, but this opioid hysteria and seeing myself and others struggling to get medication they need has put me 110% on the side of :make all drugs and pain killers OTC no exceptions.

      when we were looking at surgeons and pain doctors for my husband, their response when i said he was on vicodin (they all ask what meds he’s taking) was striking. they were so bothered by the fact that maybe he might have an hour or two where he wasn’t suffering. Gods forbid. Every doctor, before he or she can practice medicine, should have severe, chronic, unrelenting pain simulated and should be forced to spend a year going through the medical system and being treated the way we’re treated. Might teach them a little fucking compassion.

      thank you for your prayers. I am very sorry that you and your husband have been going through similar run around with your doctors. It especially angers me when it happens to a veteran, though it shouldn’t happen to anyone.


  3. I would toss in my two coppers, but it’s hard not to turn this into a political rant. However I will say this…When you are desperate, you cannot think rationally. The Government wants people to be so desperate, they will turn to the Government for everything.

    Liked by 1 person

    • ganglerisgrove

      exactly. It’s not that Sannion and I weren’t angry but …we know what that level of pain is like. you get to the point you’d do things that under normal circumstances you’d never even consider. our housemate was ripshit but we told her: don’t go after the handy man. Write your state rep because this is precisely the result of an inhumane and idiotic policy that criminalizes pain.


      • Y’all are nicer than I’d be, especially because unrelenting pain is the worst.

        I’d be calling the company, tell them what happened and say “either he returns it back, or I’m calling the cops to report a robbery of a controlled substance, you choose mother fucker, you choose.”

        Liked by 1 person

  4. So sorry for the pain you are experiencing. So sorry for the violation of your home and trust. We are all one turn of Wyrd away from serious, debilitating injury.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. ganglerisgrove

    wyrd Designs, Tatyana and i were gunning for bear but Sannion was far more compassionate and it was his medication, his pain, his call. My call had a shotgun attached to it. Tat’s involved calling the man’s boss and then the police. But Sannion’s an adult and it’s his choice how to handle it and he’s far more understanding than we are.


  6. I’m very sorry to hear about Sannion’s terrible pain and incident with the workman. Praying hard for you all. ❤


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